Thursday, July 24, 2008

Ready for a bit of humor? I was just reminded of a BS website that wanted me to join their "ring"

Hi Jesse,

I just stumbled on your blog page looking for info about a magazine called "The World of Rods". Anyway, I've been looking for guys like you to help with my website: We're writing car and bike blogs as well. If you're interested in helping out, please take a look at the site and get in touch with me.

If nothing else, I'd like to get some info about your blog on my site and I'd appreciate it if you'd do the same. My contact info's below.

Thanks for your time,
-- Craig Pike

So I read the terms of service for about a second, and then responded with:

Loosen up already.

I just went to register with your website to see how I could help.

I'm not going to participate because of your "Terms of Service"

You are still free to use and enjoy anything I've put on my website because what I do, I do for the fun of the car guys world.

NO legal BS anywhere in what I do here.

You think Steve McQueen, Mickey Thompson, Bill Monroe, Ed Roth, Von Dutch, Craig Breedlove, Smokey Yunick, Harvey Earl or any other car guys would agree to these terms of service? They would tell you "Not for a second, we got better things to do. But enjoy what we do anyway, the view is free."

This ain't how gearheads behave, how shadetree mechanics achieve greatness, how adults conduct themselves among equals, not how red blooded knuckledraggers get along on the road while enjoying the speed, smell, and view. Count me out.

Just because of the BS "Agree to the terms and conditions" load of used adult diapers. I got fun things to enjoy, a car to race, engines to tinker on, slicks to inflate, and friends to bench race with.

If you want to dispense with the "Terms" and just share in the enjoyable hobby of cars, hot rods, race cars, events, bikes, and the cool people that customize, photograph, drive, and wrench on everything with threads.... email me that you've ditched the lawyers and found a moment to appreciate the lines of a Gallardo, the smell of race car exhaust at vintage car races, the inventiveness of Bonneville racers, and the juevos of the giants that once raced without fear or safety nets... just for the fun of it.

"I agree with the Terms of Service Your should be agree with terms of service " Besides not appearing in a framework that indicates that a person can click on the (underlined and different) colored phrase "the Terms of Service" , " your should be agree with terms of service " doesn't clearly appear to the person looking at your website, on your site register page, nor is it English, more like Engrish. (on the page ) and wow, had a lawyer do that huh? I bet you haven't read it. I didn't read it either, and why not allow someone to disagree with the terms and still register? Are Al Quieda really trying to infiltrate the US government through your website? Are Ninja's going to leap out of the keyboard and destroy all they see? IS civilization as we know it going to timewarp to primeval grunts?

Maybe I'm just bent at every website needing a registration, a sign in - log in - password, every website being a totalian regime in it's own domain, but dang, can't anyone just relax and enjoy without giving up and signing over the genetic code of their next of kin in perpetuity?

"the Service. Garage Links, LLC reserves the right to change, modify, add or remove portions of the Terms of Service at any time, in its sole discretion. If you continue to use the Service after Garage Links, LLC has posted changes to the Terms of Service, it means you have accepted those changed terms."

What is "THE SERVICE" ? Do registered users get valet parking? Free car washes? Conjugal visits with female inmates? A list of email addresses to the infinitesimally rare attractive 20 or 30's woman who wrenches on her own 69 Z28 or Mach 1 before races and is looking for a guy with his own garage and beer fridge?

I hope you are laughing, cause I'm trying to adopt a level of ridiculousness that will impersonate the goof ball level of all the registration nonsense on all the websites that are just chatrooms for people with lots of time on their hands and no wrench.

the user represents and warrant that neither the content nor any parts thereof infringe upon the copyright or any other statutory or common- law intellectual property rights (including without limitation trademark, service mark, and trade name rights), proprietary rights (including without limitation trade secrets), or rights of privacy or publicity of any third party.

Let me break out a classroom full of lawyers ready for their bar exam to explain in layman terms just what the hell that bunch of used hogwash means.

I bet you can't explain that nonsense to your grandma, can you? Thats the true test of "legalese", it's BS, and your grandma aint gonna put up with it, and she loves your "legalese" butt!

The user hereby grants to Garage Links, LLC a non-exclusive, worldwide, perpetual license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform, transmit and display such Content (in whole or part) and/or to incorporate it in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed for the full term of any Rights that may exist in such Content.
Garage Links, LLC reserves the right, but not the responsibility to remove the Content

Well thats' a sweet bit of "I'm going to enjoy the rewards but not suffer the backlash of"

At this point I stopped typing, I got bored of interacting with this BS, and went on to find something fun to post.