Robin Williams in the movie with Jeff Bridges, the Fisher King... using an F100 chrome trim piece as a sword. Well, damn. I'm never going to see one again without thinking what a fine sword it would make
So, you been to Venice right, and so you know about Crazy Harry Perry and the Swami X?
So Crazy Harry Perry (who was not crazy and who used to teach Tai-Chi by the Venice pier), got famous for roller skating up to tourists with a turban and an acoustic guitar and singing "I am the man from outer space!" at the top of his lungs until you paid him to leave.
Well it was not always an acoustic, he used to have an electric guitar and had an amp strapped to his back until the lady who had the apartment before me (714 Thorton Court, with a 2cd story balcony off Ocean front walk....I was 19 fresh out of the Army and married to a Florida girl was originally a California/ Belle Glade girl whose dad ran a small tech business out of Marina Del Rey) threw a carton of eggs on his head...and the tourists, thus ending the long standing tradition of amps on the beach. At least while I was there.
Anyway this led to the acts on the beach having to ask permission from any locals who may be affected before setting up in front of their residence. There was an old style pagoda (the new ones are tiny and crappy) right in front of my place. In fact you can see it on the opening sequence of Three's Company where 'Tripper/Ritter' dumps his bike.
At this Pagoda one, 'Swami X-Used Karma Salesman' , a local legend, set up there daily after I gave him my 'approval' as the resident most 'affected'. I thought he was funny as hell. There was a guy who had Tourette's and he used to play off him, but he soon found it was safer to play off me or my brother who were for a short time always in the front row. What can I say, I'm protective by nature. We really became part of the act for at least a couple of jokes at any rate.
Anyway hold that thought.
So one night I am on my balcony and my wife lets out a blood curdling yell and hauls ass down the steps, down the back alley and around the corner and out of sight. The whole time her legs are spinning like a whiling dervish three feet above the ground, her arms flailing around like a windmill, and she is screaming at the top of her lungs.....blaaahuhhoooeeeahhhhaaawwoooo!!!!!
I was the fastest kid in my school, in fact I met her while at a football game. I was a defensive Captain/outside linebacker and she was a tall flag, I met her literally on the run. I ran down an enemy wide receiver from behind, tackling him, the line coach and her at the same time.
I couldn't catch her. She....was..g.o.n.e!
She came back nearly an hour later, out of breath and telling me that she saw Robin Williams, but that she couldn't get him to stop. (To this day I can picture him in his flip flops and shorts running for his life from my ex!)
All right, now we that set the stage, so here is the pay off.
Two weeks later I'm listening to the Swami, and I hear this unmistakable laughter coming from over my right shoulder. It takes me a minute but I see him. It's Robin holding his kid, standing with the now infamous nanny to his left. He is clearly enjoying himself.
I also noticed an interesting dynamic. Nobody else was laughing directly at the Swami's jokes. Instead the flow went like this, Swami says punchline, crowd turns, Williams laughs, crowd turns back to swami laughing....it was pretty surreal.
I also noticed nobody bothered him. The all saw him. The wanted him to see they saw him, but they did not bother him it was cool.
Afterwards Robin came up shook the Swami's hand and told him that he should come to one of the clubs he went too, (he said the name but I can't remember it.
At this point the Swami X, Venice Beach legend introduced my brother and I to Robin Williams comedy legend.....as his roadies! Smart ass.
I got to shake the man's hand though, that was a pretty cool day.
a handshake is better than an autograph! I haven't been to Venice Beach, I haven't heard of Crazy Harry, or Swami X. I haven't heard of the nanny either... it's a big world, and there is so much that is yet to be learned... You got out of the Army at 19? Damn, you weren't in long! What was your Army rating and did you get around the world?
I was a treadhead, I went in on a two year enlistment at 17 and already had a skeeter wing from helping out at the recruiting office while on delayed entry. I left an acting jack e-5 (the M1 tank program was still very new and under a lot of fire, PM magazine filmed parts of my actual bootcamp) The M1 tank project when I arrived at boot (OSUT) in may 0f 82 was still very new. General Dynamics had just taken over the M1 program from Chrysler where it had been designated the XM1. It was so new that our DIs who were pretty much all Vietnam veterans (our senior drill still had Khakis and wore them...a lot) were barred from being our tank instructors because their thinking on tank warfare was thought to be archaic at the time. It translated into a lot of unnecessary pain on all sides involved. The DIs felt the Army as throwing them under the bus (and the Army did treat its Vietnam vets poorly) which caused some of them in turn to pour out their grief on their phase one trainees resulting in a number of E-7s and sixes getting busted for trainee abuse, and a number of otherwise solid boots getting washed. We had a higher attrition rate than the Special Forces (maybe an exaggeration, but not much) with our graduating company being only about 40 percent of the original 120 plus build up. The Army did have a point though. The M1 was named after General Abrams who wrote tank doctrine in the forties and was handed to low level battlefield commanders who had to change that doctrine on the fly in order to make use of the extraordinary capabilities of our track. Anyway I could go on but I won't. Suffice it to say that many of the recent grads were giving temporary bumps in order to turn around and fulfill the training needs for their fellow students coming up in the companies behind them. So myself and three others were bumped in that group, two acting jack corporals and me an acting jack E-5 buck sergeant, straight out of OSUT. That was it. That was my whole term. With the exception of a 45 day TDY as a hometown recruiter, and a couple of ARTEPS, I spent the entire rest of my enlistment as a tank instructor at Knox. They wanted me to stay, even promised me a slot at OCS, but I had enough. I was only there because I felt we should all serve in some capacity, and if war broke out I didn't want to have to say they needed to come looking for me. (Cold war, you understand) But in the end, I had things to do and places to see, and a hot chick to chase so off to elsewhere I went. It was just dumb luck that elsewhere turned out to be California because the chick I was chasing was a self proclaimed valley girl who wanted to be a Rockette, or movie star or whatever. Ironically I would never see combat in a tank or in the army. But in a way the greatest tank battle of our lifetime, 73 Easting would not have happened at all without me and a few friends. Because I was one of the many merchant mariner volunteers who took all those tanks and supplies over there in desert storm, on those old crapped out Liberty ships Rosie the riveter built and that the navy had been taking care of all those years past up on the Natchez.
I wrote a poem about it through (my time at Knox), because I loved the original M1. Maybe I’ll share that someday if you are really hard up for cornball, teenage bravado in the form of poorly written verse.
Also got stories about, *Micheal Keaton, (met and joke around with him at a culver city liquor store after Jonny Dangerously) *Micheal Gross, (talked to him at length outside of Cedar Sinai just like we were neighbors), *Dana Delany, (who I literally bumped into, because she was my actual neighbor), *Louisa Moritz, ( who I help at a charity even because she was the ex wife of my bodyguard friend 'Ram') *Ted Knight, (who my brother threw a pad of paper and a pencil at during his star on the walk of fame ceremony) *A Schwarzenegger producer, (whose name escapes me, but who told me to pick up Arnie’s 80 lb Conan practice sword which he had in his office, an office I stumbled upon after sneaking onto MGM grand to sell massage pillows….yeah you read that gibberish right, such was my life)
*Lou Ferigno, ( who I personally did not interact with , but was there when one of my moronic sales crewman attempted to get his attention and failed because…Lou’s deaf and my friend was stupid)
There’s more related to my ever so short stint as a salesman, (it was a second job) got the autographs of the entire Hannah Barbara studio staff including the writers of the Jetsons, snuck into the screen actors guild over the back door laser trip wire, (really guys!?), snuck into the Peterson Publishing building, which used to house Playboy magazine only to be tossed out several times by a squad of grinning guidos Who looked collectively looked like an advertisement for muscular steroid enhancement before they shared the obvious fact that they were watching me each time on hidden cameras!
I was only in California a few years, but they were really, entertaining years…….
So, you been to Venice right, and so you know about Crazy Harry Perry and the Swami X?
ReplyDeleteSo Crazy Harry Perry (who was not crazy and who used to teach Tai-Chi by the Venice pier), got famous for roller skating up to tourists with a turban and an acoustic guitar and singing "I am the man from outer space!" at the top of his lungs until you paid him to leave.
Well it was not always an acoustic, he used to have an electric guitar and had an amp strapped to his back until the lady who had the apartment before me (714 Thorton Court, with a 2cd story balcony off Ocean front walk....I was 19 fresh out of the Army and married to a Florida girl was originally a California/ Belle Glade girl whose dad ran a small tech business out of Marina Del Rey) threw a carton of eggs on his head...and the tourists, thus ending the long standing tradition of amps on the beach. At least while I was there.
Anyway this led to the acts on the beach having to ask permission from any locals who may be affected before setting up in front of their residence. There was an old style pagoda (the new ones are tiny and crappy) right in front of my place. In fact you can see it on the opening sequence of Three's Company where 'Tripper/Ritter' dumps his bike.
At this Pagoda one, 'Swami X-Used Karma Salesman' , a local legend, set up there daily after I gave him my 'approval' as the resident most 'affected'. I thought he was funny as hell. There was a guy who had Tourette's and he used to play off him, but he soon found it was safer to play off me or my brother who were for a short time always in the front row. What can I say, I'm protective by nature. We really became part of the act for at least a couple of jokes at any rate.
Anyway hold that thought.
So one night I am on my balcony and my wife lets out a blood curdling yell and hauls ass down the steps, down the back alley and around the corner and out of sight. The whole time her legs are spinning like a whiling dervish three feet above the ground, her arms flailing around like a windmill, and she is screaming at the top of her lungs.....blaaahuhhoooeeeahhhhaaawwoooo!!!!!
I was the fastest kid in my school, in fact I met her while at a football game. I was a defensive Captain/outside linebacker and she was a tall flag, I met her literally on the run. I ran down an enemy wide receiver from behind, tackling him, the line coach and her at the same time.
I couldn't catch her. She....was..g.o.n.e!
She came back nearly an hour later, out of breath and telling me that she saw Robin Williams, but that she couldn't get him to stop. (To this day I can picture him in his flip flops and shorts running for his life from my ex!)
All right, now we that set the stage, so here is the pay off.
Two weeks later I'm listening to the Swami, and I hear this unmistakable laughter coming from over my right shoulder. It takes me a minute but I see him. It's Robin holding his kid, standing with the now infamous nanny to his left. He is clearly enjoying himself.
I also noticed an interesting dynamic. Nobody else was laughing directly at the Swami's jokes. Instead the flow went like this, Swami says punchline, crowd turns, Williams laughs, crowd turns back to swami laughing....it was pretty surreal.
I also noticed nobody bothered him. The all saw him. The wanted him to see they saw him, but they did not bother him it was cool.
Afterwards Robin came up shook the Swami's hand and told him that he should come to one of the clubs he went too, (he said the name but I can't remember it.
At this point the Swami X, Venice Beach legend introduced my brother and I to Robin Williams comedy legend.....as his roadies! Smart ass.
I got to shake the man's hand though, that was a pretty cool day.
a handshake is better than an autograph!
DeleteI haven't been to Venice Beach, I haven't heard of Crazy Harry, or Swami X.
I haven't heard of the nanny either...
it's a big world, and there is so much that is yet to be learned...
You got out of the Army at 19? Damn, you weren't in long! What was your Army rating and did you get around the world?
I was a treadhead, I went in on a two year enlistment at 17 and already had a skeeter wing from helping out at the recruiting office while on delayed entry.
ReplyDeleteI left an acting jack e-5 (the M1 tank program was still very new and under a lot of fire, PM magazine filmed parts of my actual bootcamp)
The M1 tank project when I arrived at boot (OSUT) in may 0f 82 was still very new. General Dynamics had just taken over the M1 program from Chrysler where it had been designated the XM1.
It was so new that our DIs who were pretty much all Vietnam veterans (our senior drill still had Khakis and wore them...a lot) were barred from being our tank instructors because their thinking on tank warfare was thought to be archaic at the time.
It translated into a lot of unnecessary pain on all sides involved. The DIs felt the Army as throwing them under the bus (and the Army did treat its Vietnam vets poorly) which caused some of them in turn to pour out their grief on their phase one trainees resulting in a number of E-7s and sixes getting busted for trainee abuse, and a number of otherwise solid boots getting washed.
We had a higher attrition rate than the Special Forces (maybe an exaggeration, but not much) with our graduating company being only about 40 percent of the original 120 plus build up.
The Army did have a point though. The M1 was named after General Abrams who wrote tank doctrine in the forties and was handed to low level battlefield commanders who had to change that doctrine on the fly in order to make use of the extraordinary capabilities of our track.
Anyway I could go on but I won't. Suffice it to say that many of the recent grads were giving temporary bumps in order to turn around and fulfill the training needs for their fellow students coming up in the companies behind them.
So myself and three others were bumped in that group, two acting jack corporals and me an acting jack E-5 buck sergeant, straight out of OSUT.
That was it. That was my whole term. With the exception of a 45 day TDY as a hometown recruiter, and a couple of ARTEPS, I spent the entire rest of my enlistment as a tank instructor at Knox.
They wanted me to stay, even promised me a slot at OCS, but I had enough. I was only there because I felt we should all serve in some capacity, and if war broke out I didn't want to have to say they needed to come looking for me. (Cold war, you understand)
But in the end, I had things to do and places to see, and a hot chick to chase so off to elsewhere I went. It was just dumb luck that elsewhere turned out to be California because the chick I was chasing was a self proclaimed valley girl who wanted to be a Rockette, or movie star or whatever.
Ironically I would never see combat in a tank or in the army. But in a way the greatest tank battle of our lifetime, 73 Easting would not have happened at all without me and a few friends. Because I was one of the many merchant mariner volunteers who took all those tanks and supplies over there in desert storm, on those old crapped out Liberty ships Rosie the riveter built and that the navy had been taking care of all those years past up on the Natchez.
I wrote a poem about it through (my time at Knox), because I loved the original M1. Maybe I’ll share that someday if you are really hard up for cornball, teenage bravado in the form of poorly written verse.
wow. Just wow. Of course I want to read the poem!
DeleteAnd see my next comment about writing your memoirs!
Also got stories about,
ReplyDelete*Micheal Keaton, (met and joke around with him at a culver city liquor store after Jonny Dangerously)
*Micheal Gross, (talked to him at length outside of Cedar Sinai just like we were neighbors),
*Dana Delany, (who I literally bumped into, because she was my actual neighbor),
*Louisa Moritz, ( who I help at a charity even because she was the ex wife of my bodyguard friend 'Ram')
*Ted Knight, (who my brother threw a pad of paper and a pencil at during his star on the walk of fame ceremony)
*A Schwarzenegger producer, (whose name escapes me, but who told me to pick up Arnie’s 80 lb Conan practice sword which he had in his office, an office I stumbled upon after sneaking onto MGM grand to sell massage pillows….yeah you read that gibberish right, such was my life)
*Lou Ferigno, ( who I personally did not interact with , but was there when one of my moronic sales crewman attempted to get his attention and failed because…Lou’s deaf and my friend was stupid)
There’s more related to my ever so short stint as a salesman, (it was a second job) got the autographs of the entire Hannah Barbara studio staff including the writers of the Jetsons, snuck into the screen actors guild over the back door laser trip wire, (really guys!?), snuck into the Peterson Publishing building, which used to house Playboy magazine only to be tossed out several times by a squad of grinning guidos
Who looked collectively looked like an advertisement for muscular steroid enhancement before they shared the obvious fact that they were watching me each time on hidden cameras!
I was only in California a few years, but they were really, entertaining years…….
Wow, what a time! I hope you write your memoirs!
DeleteFt Knox reveille,
ReplyDeleteblinding sun,
hillsides trembling,
M-One!
Training battle,
almost real,
smoke and fire,
steel on steel!
Explosions rocking
tree-lined crest,
firey hornets,
from an armored nest!
Born for combat,
America’s son,
Frontline freedom,
M-One!
I warned you it was bad,
I was 17 when I wrote that...
I like it!
Delete